6 Ways To Build Unbreakable Confidence From The Outside In

There are a million different resources and pieces advice out there from “experts” on how to build confidence, particularly self-confidence. A vulnerable and anxious population consumes this guidance like they are starving for it… probably because they are. The dream of being able to overcome all fear and self-imposed limits by simply reading some advice is a very tempting dish indeed.

After lifetimes of being subject to images and ideals that they cannot possibly live up to, people start to feel like they are “less than”. This fear of being a substandard human being drives some of us to seek guidance, bringing us into contact with the murky, over-crowded world of self-help products and services.

Look, some of the stuff out there is good – I know, I’ve tried most of it. But some of it is very misguided and, frankly, delusional. People who lack self-confidence themselves can take a basic, theoretical knowledge of psychological research and use it to excrete volumes of garbage about how to build self-esteem and confidence. They then charge copious amounts of money for this drivel, which usually makes you feel great temporarily but does absolutely nothing to change your long term situation.

I’m not going to pretend I know it all. But what I do have to offer is that I have completed the full journey, from shy, “nice” and trying to please everyone, all the way through to where I am now. And where is that? What does being confident mean to me? It means that these things now occur in my life where they didn’t before:

1 I regularly seek out opportunities to push boundaries and expand my comfort zone, running towards fear rather than away from it

2 I can go into a situation full of anxiety and yet quickly push through that to enable me to feel competent and at ease

3 I feel comfortable being honest in all situations.

4 Rather than hide my views I express them, calmly and diplomatically where required, but also without compromise

5 I place my needs above everything else. I am selfish about developing my life and inner-self because I know that ultimately the people in my life will benefit from me being a better person

6 Most importantly from my point of view, I can’t remember the last time I felt jealousy or envy, and it’s been many, many years since I entertained the idea of wanting to be anyone else

So how did I get to this from being a “nice” guy that did all I could to avoid confrontation and anxiety-provoking situations? Well, it wasn’t easy! But in worked. by DAN MUNRO

Self confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have. how can anyone see how awesome you are if you can’t see it yourself?” – xoxo; MANKA